Give and You Shall Receive

So have you ever been given a gift and tried to reject the gift because you knew that you would feel this pang in your mind that told you that you would now have to give a gift to that person? That right there is the norm of reciprocity. The norm of reciprocity states that we treat others as they have treated us--to the best of our abilities I would add (Gouldner, 1960). This norm of reciprocity is essentially the "Golden Rule" on the positive side of things and an "eye for an eye" on the negative.

I feel like the norm of reciprocity is used most during the Christmas season. How often is it that during this time, someone gives you a gift and then you feel this compelling want to give them something in return? For me its pretty often. If anyone gives me a gift during Christmas or for my birthday I always feel compelled to get them something in return.

I've been a firm believer in the whole "you must give to receive" saying for most of my life, so this past Christmas I wanted to give gifts to a few friends knowing full well that by giving them the gift, they would feel compelled to get me something in return. Truth be told I wasn't really expecting something from all of them and wanted to give the gifts because they were really cool people. However, I still gave the gifts and indeed did get some gifts in return, which made me really happy.

Now that I've actually read about this technique and the others: the "foot-in-the-door," the "door in the face," and "that's not all" techniques (I'd only ever use low balling against someone I don't like), I feel like I can use them a lot more to make some gains. Especially for upcoming informational sessions I have to help out with or for collecting donations for Habitat for Humanity or Relay for Life. I could also very easily apply them at home more efficiently to get some gains. The tricks may be devious, but they're being used for a good cause in any situation that I would apply them.



References:

Gouldner, A. W. (1960). The norm of reciprocity: A preliminary statement. American Sociological Review, 25, 161-178.